United 0, Columbus 1

Lordy, United sucks.

What's triply special about ZERO SHOTS ON GOAL? The three balls (one by Quaranta, two by Najar) in the first twenty-five minutes that not only should have been shots on goal but GOALS! if United's most talented striker, Danny Allsopp, didn't suck as much as he is slow, wasn't slow as much as he sucks.

12, 075?

I don't think so.

O! Hamid needs to start every game the rest of season to get the rest of his rookie yips out of his system.

O! On the Fuck-Me-Jig front (I assume Payne made this statement at the 5 o'clock meet and greet with season ticket-holders):

"We continue to work within the District. It's not an issue that is really going to become public for a while yet because it's not ready to. We are spending time with a couple of different developers that are well-respected. We are trying to understand what can and cannot work. We have spent a lot more time in D.C. than Virginia, frankly. It's pretty difficult to do these things in Virginia.

"We've made some progress, at least in terms of ourselves understanding sites. There is more than one in D.C. The RFK campus is not one we have spent a lot of time on, but it is always in the back of everybody's mind. It's not as simple as people might think because it would require an act of Congress. The stadium act is pretty specific: It's for a single stadium, and we don't want anything to do with knocking this one down. It would be really expensive."

At least in terms of ourselves understanding sites. Sort of like ZERO SHOTS ON GOAL! yes?