Ferals v Assholes

Here's Nap luxuriating on my freshly mowed lawn yesterday, reducing the value of my home.

Since K asked, the ferals are great. I don't think any but mom is still truly feral. Nap isn't: he's a cuddlewhore, comes in and out of the house; he and Fleabus have bumped noses without hissing! Grey Cat's becoming a cuddlewhore, looks in the house like she wants to come in, then runs away when we open the door. Frankie begs to be pet and runs when I try, the dumbfuck, and always comes and sits near us when we're on the back porch, purring and kneading the grass. Mom will actually now walk to within ten feet and then sit until we leave so she can eat. They love them a fresh mowed lawn.

The asshole neighbors? They finally got back from vacation around early August. I saw the husband out cutting his front lawn and walked down and gave him the two motion detectors I bought (@ $50 each), told him they were theirs as long as they lived in the house (they've been trying to sell it) but we'd like them back when they move (in case and because). He made sorry-my-wife-is-a-bitch noises, shook my hand, and we haven't seen him or his wife or their cars since.

The for sale sign has been taken down. The neighbor between the assholes' house and ours is parking one of their cars in front of the assholes' house, in part to make it look like someone's there, in part because they brought back from whatever cracker campground they'd been housing their cracker camper and parked it in front of their house. It's awesome. Feral cats? Home values diminish. Cracker campers parked in the street? Home values skyrocket!

So, to recap: neighbor calls animal control because Napoleon slept on their sun-baked concrete front stoop, threatens to have the ferals trapped and killed, then goes on vacation. The day I'm contacted by animal control I contact my friend at Metro Ferals who recommends motion detectors. I go to the web and order two and wait three weeks for the neighbors to return from vacation. I deliver the motion detectors. They move the next day. Assholes.