BLCKDGRD

Autoblogography

Again an obamapawn an obamapunk an obamapest an obamaprat an obamaprop an obamapimp an obamaprank an obamaplot an obamapostate an obamapologist an obamapieceofshit. Truly, eight fucking years of daily monitoring my obamabarometer stanks of obamapoop.

He's great! He sucks!

Growl and purr, no one charts the fluctuations of my narratives but me, and I'd sooner engineer another cloverleaf to self-indulgence than coordinate my grids with a mimicry of consistencies that don't exist.

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• The Hard Case.
• Brad DeLong picks a fight with David Harvey. (h/t)
• Tortured Phish.
• Who won't be running for President in 2012.
• This Blog Is Not a Safe Zone.
• The word you're looking for is pussy.
• The horror that is Europe.
• Coming soon (h/t)

• New Frank Bidart poem, an Italo Calvino story from 1968.
• Barbara Guest poems.
• New Rae Armentrout poem. Armentrout reviewed. (h/t)
• Jesse Ball?
• For the sake of filmic clarity.
• Down at the bottom of the right hand yellow column, archives of recent live in-studios at KEXP by Juana Molina and Chuck Prophet!

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I've posted a live version, here's the album version

Please Ask Nicely

Kevin Payne is taking live chat questions today at 1130 at WaPo.

PLEASE, being polite, send questions and comments (you can do so now, you don't have to wait until 1130) asking about LOUD SIDE!

You do know LOUD SIDE! will be, at best, banished to an end-zone corner, yes? And increased ticket prices for shabbier citizenship, yes? Ask him to say that's not true.

PLEASE ask, what loyalty will United show its Supporters Club? even if rhetorical, even as Payne mumbles platitudes about loyalty.

UPDATE:

Here's the discussion. The words loud side are mentioned once by a questioner, never by Payne.

Washington, DC: Mr. Payne, I understand that on the scale of priorities this would be low, but is there any chance stands on one side in the new stadium might be constructed so that they bounce like the "temporary" stands on the loud side at RFK? The bouncing stands and supporters have become a signature of the Barra and Screaming Eagles, and DCU matches in general. It would add cost, for sure, but also a uniqueness that's tied to the club's history.

Kevin Payne: Mentioned already that we have asked the architects if there is a way to do this. No promises, but we love it too! Will Chang even sits over there sometimes, and that's the first place I go after a big win!

Other choice quotes?

• we have asked our architects and engineers, who have been at many of our matches, to figure out a way to keep the "bouncing stands!" May not be possible, but we're gonna try!
• We don't anticipate dramatic increases, though there will surely be some increase. But, we will have a lot of different type of seats in the new stadium -- modern suites, club seats with amenities, fantasy seats, we might even have standing room areas!
• You should contact your ticket rep, but we will certainly be respecting the allegiance of our long time fans through a priority list for season tickets at the new stadium. That list exists today, and you should be sure you're on it.
• We have no intention of changing the most recognized name in American soccer.
• We recognize the importance of tail-gating, and are hoping to find a site which still permits that while at the same time taking advantage of metro.

We'll see.

Autoblogography

I put a brand new still shrink-sealed tablet in my new bought for London backpack, the current moleskin just a quarter used. I'm a rube for rituals and rules, my ritual and rules' rubery why I think you're a rube too. I'll carry new shrink-wrapped tablet in new backpack until the moleskin is finished, a policy already harming the quality of what I write in moleskin.

Honestly, who but the complicit can save us from the complicit?

I work in a profession that's as stick-up-assed as any other except other professions laugh at librarians like surgeons laugh at pediatricians (the killer interview question for a librarian seeking a job is, English major, Art History major, Philosophy major, ....?). Librarians, smart librarians, know they're obsolete (I'm not a librarian as librarians enjoy telling me, I'm stupid, my masters is in English, I work for librarians), ten more years, fifteen more years, museum pieces.

(Librarians as porters, all of us as porters, The Porter Dance in The Unconsoled. Details to follow (or not)).

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• The two-progressivisms, and a response.

 

• An anarchist syllabus.
• Top Ten Emperors.
• Shock Doctrine: The Movie. (h/t 10%)
• The answer is Yes.
• Obama Whiplash Syndrome.
• OK, this:

• Guide to "conservative movie" watching.
• Ed's next Roundtable Discussion. I confess, I've never heard of Eric Kraft. Fortunately, I have a library at my disposal, so any suggestion on which Peter Leroy novel to start with, please?
• Kleinzahler once, twice, three times, four.

Updates later. Or not.

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My head, your head:

Shut Up re: shutting up

 

I decree: Any elected Democrat at national, state, or local level and/or their spokespersons, aides, and/or surrogates and/or any "left-leaning" talking head, columnist, and/or shetty blegger, major and/or minor, who advocates or in any manor considers any positive aspect and/or implementation of a "Fairness Doctrine" will be executed with all neenered dispatch.

Heh. Why Obama would want Limbaugh to shut up puzzles my puny imagination, but beyond, the American Taliban can motivate themselves fine without giving them a righteously rallying and noble cause: No one wants a Fairness Doctrine more than those it'd mean to muzzle.

Obama should announce, to a planted question at his next news conference, that he is adamantly against any Fairness Doctrine and will veto any bill that limits free speech. Nothing - nothing - would piss off Michelle Malkin more.

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• When Blog-Overlords slap-fight over who's neenering whom. Seriously, the battle for King Neener will be pathetically sillyassified.
• Rich neeners Obama's neenerers.
• Post-partisanship = Post-temperature refrigerators.
• Colossal Asshole.
• UK's Democrats suck too.
• We are all socialists now. (h/t James)
• We're all Swedes now.
• Thought for the day.
• Logical conundrums.
• Fried Green al-Qaedas.
• Never get a digital correspondent to write about fiction.
• On Ikea furniture.
• Not the best cross-selling idea.
• Things your children will never understand.
• Blographia Literaria.
• M Ward profiled.

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M Ward?

Yeah. And?

I start my car in the parking of Dulles and hear on the radio Judd Gregg withdrew his name as Commerce Secretary, Obama punking Obama again.

Floyd neeners. Silbur neeners. I'm convinced Obama was more their object of longing than mine. 

I was - I am, the pint bets stand - betting on Obama the Sharkiest Shooter in the Parlor, not Obama the Savior. Maybe he still is; impatience is a rube's first and necessary mistake.

The last assclown ate his own bullshit for self-definition. I rubily assume(d) Obama brushes(d) his teeth after regurgitating his bullshit into my needy beak.

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• The most important thing you'll read today.
• The most interesting thing you'll read today.
• Bring tyranny home.
• I wondered what was with the police cars.
• Aeghcn.
• Battlestar Obama.
• Everything is a security issue.
• Career training and normal times.
• Holbrook Shopping Center?
• Superior civilizations. (My Uncle Wayne once told me Edward O. Wilson was the greatest scientific mind of his generation.)
• Improv'd Autotypist.
• Evol.
• Darwin Fish.
• Jim's ur-story post leads to John Cale.
• Richard thought-provokingly metablogs once, twice, thrice.
• The Reading Experience turns five. Congrats, Dan.
• On untenable dualisms. I'd like to think the article title is a Pixies allusion.
• The Leisure Society.
• We are floating in space.
• Neko Case profiled.

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Neko Case?

Morgan Boulevard United!

Lacks rhythm, Morgan Boulevard United, clap, clap, clap-clap-clap:

Meeting with state senators from Prince George's in Annapolis, Victor MacFarlane said the team wants to build a 24,000-seat "urban stadium" in the county that would be the center of a mixed-use development project....

MacFarlane said the team would pay 25 percent of the estimated $180 million to $195 million that a stadium would cost. The remainder would be financed by tax revenue generated at the stadium....

He told Prince George's senators that the team is looking at three sites for the stadium in the county. One is at the Morgan Boulevard Metro Station, owned by Metro, and a second is at the same station, owned by the Maryland National Capital Park and Planning Commission. A third site in Largo is also under consideration, he said.

I'll believe it when contracts are signed and ground is broken, but this is far more likely than any DC stadium ever was.

The story says other sites are under consideration, but Morgan Blvd or Largo are on the Blue, and to keep NOVA fans in the stands, the stadium needs to be on Blue or Orange, adding just fifteen more minutes of train time and no transferring - Greenbelt would suck to get to by Metro from Vienna.

The words "Martin" and "O'Malley" are noticeably missing from the story, and lord knows if state money is involved the opportunities for demagoguery are too juicy to ignore, so if this eventually happens, three years minimum?

Even if this is a feint and fuck-you to the District, the District certainly deserves the feint and fuck-you. And it would be the end of LOUD SIDE!, which sucks beyond words, but doesn't suck as much as losing the team altogether.

UPDATE:

From Elric, in comments - but since many don't read the comments, worth posting here:

Big fuck-you to District. When they tear down RFK, what happens to that neighborhood? One would assume that they might recognize what MCI/Verizon Center did for Chinatown. Even Navy Yard area is getting a boost from that overpriced beisbol monstrosity. I guess the view isn't so good when your head is up your ass.

DCNG needs a new armory. Tear down DC General and put it there, build a new stadium on the old armory site, and build a new community on the RFK parking lots. The RFK site itself would make a nice circle/park/memorial to something or another (it would have been perfect for a MLK memorial), and everybody wins...

But Jack Evans doesn't give a shit about the quality of life in DC south or east of Dupont, and he has some magical ability to push through incredibly huge taxpayer-funded projects for the good of DC's cracker minority, at the expense of DC's non-cracker majority (and in spite of all the whiteys at DC United matches, it is still considered a "minority" sport, what with all the spics and negroes there). And Fenty is a scrotumless douchebag totally lacking in foresight.

PG United will not be a success, and the huge rise in ticket prices will chase away the majority of casual fans and latinos.

It's all a moot point anyway, since MLS inexplicably strayed from their successful business plan and forced financially struggling clubs to sign washed-up internationals for ridiculous salaries while paying homegrown talent less than the average part-time JiffyLube "technician". Is there a single MLS team that even comes close to breaking even? I seriously doubt it.

I doubt if the league will survive the upcoming lockout/strike thing, especially in this FUBAR economy. Enjoy it while you can, and tell your grandkids about it.

Sounds entirely plausible to me. And you thought I was the doomier one.

Fifty-Nine Today

I've said it before, the best show I ever saw was Gabriel at the Warner in 1983, the Security tour. Elric, were you there?

Too Over Too Soon

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Home. We are saving for our trip back now.

What You're Not Watching

The theme song for the England national broadcast of Spain v England on ITV is, unsurprisingly, The Verve's "Bittersweet Symphony." The bumper music going in and out of commercials during pregame and halftime (it's half as I type this, Spain 1, England 0) is fracking Arcade Fire's "No Cars Go." Feebus juckity.

It's a friendly, both teams fielding half-strength teams, but Spain clearly classier, the lead deserved. And now, as I finish this paragraph, Beckham is subbed in to start the 2nd half (along with Fuck Lampard).

According to the England fans in the hotel lounge, every one of the field is a "right fucker," a term that means shitty good to shitty bad, often simultaneously and not at all contradictorily, though their loathing for England's Brave John Terry and Fuck Lampard is multiplied by a factor of the term "sodden," as in Fuck Lampard is a right sodden fucker.

I said I'm a bad vacationer. I didn't say I wasn't having fun.

Meargh

I am not a good vacationer. I don't enjoy vacations as much as others do, or if I do, they don't enjoy it as much as I think they do.

I love to worry about things I can't control - work, United, the global economy, Obama's vast and as yet barely tapped suckitude. I'm in control of worrying about things I can't control, they're durable and dependable, they form the poles around which I schedule my daily ineffectualness.

This is also a vacation in which I don't have a car, am completely reliant on trains or planes or buses. How suck.

I'm sitting on a bus between Warminster and Bath, thinking about what shit's queueing at work, what imbecility United's management is concocting, how billion's security is being systematically looted to secure eternal limosine service for the world's CEOs, how rubily I overestimated Obama's ambition to be great, and I think, if only I had a car to explore these roads while deliciously anguishing over everything I can't control.