End of Onalfo Era

To the surprise of no one, Kevin Payne blamed the players for United's performance and then fired Curt Onalfo, hiring Saint Benny of Olsen as interim coach. 

Someone had to be sacrificed: if the Salt Lake game this past Saturday proved anything, it's that not doing anything would be equivalent to the franchise quitting. When Perkins gacked that first soft goal, and what modest promise had been gained by the addition of Hernandez and Bošković trickled off Perkin's gloves, something, or rather, someone had to change, and the only viable option - Payne wasn't going to fire himself, he wasn't going to fire Kasper, he can't fire all the players - was Onalfo. Consider the logic:

Landru dances on Onalfo's grave, offers some graveyard-whistling worry for Benny, then gives in to Benny Love.

D briefly surfaces from his cubicle at Exploit Douche and Tool to praise Saint Benny and wonder if Payne and Kasper will reboot their practices, to which I say no.

As does Fullback, who calls this the easiest, most predictable, most cynical move Kevin Payne could and would make, to which I say yes.

As someone who one post down calls himself a motherfucking atheist with an addiction for religiosity, of course I swoon when I hear:

He brings fire and pride. He understands what the uniform means. He understands what it means to our fans...

but when I finish reading the whole quote

He understands what it means to our front office. He understands what it should mean to the players in the locker room. I am hoping that he will be able to constantly remind the players of that. There are some players in the locker room who don't understand what that means. Part of Ben's job is to remind them...

I remember I'm not a motherfucking atheist playing at religiosity, I'm a motherfucking rube juggling my giggles and my guilt.

Bless Saint Benny of Olsen, who no one held a gun to his head when he accepted the job of being fucked over by Kevin Payne, just as no one will hold a gun to my head when I renew my season tickets for next season.